Ask A Geologist: Emergency Actual Geology Question Edition

ZOMFG!!!1!! EARTHQUAKE! BLARRGGGGHH WHAT DO I DOooooooooooooooooo?

This summarizes the texts, voicemails, FB msgs and emails that awaited me today when I got out of my geology class. Apparently there was an earthquake outside of DC that shook the East coast while I was teaching class. I say "apparently" because I didn't feel it at all and didn't even know about it until Kalif told me about it. I was thinking about Hurricane Irene and what a pretty day it is today so I had no idea something kick ass had just happened.

Geologists, like most scientists, like to talk about disasters hypothetically but we get pretty shifty eyed when you start getting specific about stuff. We live in a litigious society and I don't want you to sue me if you follow my advice and all of your cows end up falling off of the freeway. (Foreshadowing.)

I also don't like answering actual geology questions during Ask A Geologist. One of my friends told me that she doesn't read these because she assumed they were about science and I'd hate to have her click on this the one time I'm not talking about Donald Glover.

But my people, that's you, have demanded that I write an emergency Ask a Geologist about this business and I feel like I must do what the fans call for. All eleven of you! Everybodyreadingthisblog say, "Hooooooo!" (In the comments.)

Anyway. You have questions. I have answers.

Am I in any danger?

Always.

Am I going to die?

Yes. (But probably not because of this.)

What should I do?

Well, since the earthquake is over now I think you should post on FB about it and call your grandma who lives in Virginia. I mean, I'm sure she's fine, but she probably wants to talk about this a little bit. Then you should have some ice cream and possibly take a nap. I mean, dude, a natural disaster occurred today.

If another one happens in your life you should just do whatever you did today cause that seems to have worked out fine for you.

In general it's a good idea to not be on any overpasses, bridges, roller coasters or other fragile man made structures during an earthquake. If you're in an earthquake prone region you should stay inside because the buildings are built to standards for this kind of thing. If you're in a heavily populated area you should stay inside and move into a doorway or under a table. If you're in a normal kind of area you should move out doors if at all possible. They say that earthquakes don't kill people...buildings do. There is a lot of truth in that. Flying debris, things falling from shelves, building collapse...these are serious things that can be prevented by stepping outside.

My friend Beth just came back from living in Tokyo and she was there during the tragic Japanese earthquakes. She mentioned that they advise you to stick close to buildings during an earthquake and in a city like Tokyo this is absolutely great advice. If you live in the country or the suburbs you should try to get outside. (Ideally you'd be in a plane.)

One of the most dangerous aspects of earthquakes is not the quake itself but fire. Ruptured gas lines, power lines and other things that don't like to be jiggled can lead to outbreaks of fires that can very quickly get out of control in a disaster type situation where emergency services are unprepared. This is another instance where you're better off being outside and mobile. If you know how to turn off your gas line you should do that after a quake. If you have natural gas you should also be sensitive to how you are feeling to make sure you're not getting carbon monoxide poisoning from a ruptured line. Headache and flu like symptoms can that are alleviated when you leave the building can be a bad sign.

Some other bad things that happen during and after an earthquake are landslides, the ground turning to liquid (temporarily) and holes forming where loose material has shifted.

These aren't really things you can plan for. Just be careful and alert! I mean, you know, good luck with that.

What if a rift opens up in the earth and eats you. Does that count as the earthquake killing you?

It absolutely counts. There's a truly terrible 70's movie called Earthquake starring Charleton Heston and Shaft that in addition to being racist as Hell is also truly scientifically redonkulous. The earthquake goes on for a million minutes, the plot is absurd and well...here's a clip.



(Pay particular attention to homegirl in the all pink turtleneck ensemble.)

Those poor cows.

Anyways, a rift is probably not going to open up and swallow you and it it does it's not going to like, go to the center of the Earth or even the mantle or anything so you should be fine. BUT in the event that a rift does start to form you should run away from it not towards it like all the idiots and movies do. You can get your belongings/loved ones that are on the other side of the rift in like 20 seconds with the quake is over. This goes for crevasses too. You run away from them. Then when they are over get some freaking rope and like a ladder or something and peak into the rift. Seriously.

I love how there is "breaking news" on ALL channels about this earthquake. Where I come from its usually a lady in a moo moo and curlers talking about the "tornada". Could this count as cultural research?

Yup. Especially for UNC-Chapel Hill. Everything counts as cultural research over there.

Turn off your television. It's all a bunch of alarmist crap unless you are watching cartoons or Arrested Development. (Bring back Firefly!) Obviously everything is basically fine and it probably wasn't a foreshock for the big one. (I'm sorry if that didn't occur to you but it's the first thing that occurred to me.)You're not going to get any real information about this business because like I said before, scientists don't want to go on the record with this kind of stuff and the government doesn't want you going all survivalist at Super Wal*mart and stampeding like cattle. If you're seriously worried about the end of times and natural disasters the best use of your time is to start calling people you love and reminding them that you love them. Then do something fun. Better yet throw a party and tell all of the people you love them at the same time and eat cake.

If you have energy left over when you're done with your party you should give some money to the Red Cross or donate some time or money to a place where something bad has really happened since we lucked out this time. It's good karma.




I'll answer specific geology questions in the comments...ok?

Also, I love you. :)